First she was a mom to only me. I was her fur baby. Her one and only. I think fondly upon those times, when we’d go to the dog park and I’d accompany her on car rides and we went on long walks and other journeys to nowhere in particular. Those were good times.
Then dear baby Carter was born and everything changed. I wasn’t number one anymore, and I didn’t handle it well at first. Don’t get me wrong, I was incredibly excited to finally meet my new little person. Beyond that I was thrilled to see the joy he brought my beloved forever parents (it made up for all the crying newborns do). But I didn’t like sharing the person who had truly become my person in my heart.
Soon there will be another little person and I find myself regressing back into a doggie depression just thinking about the reality of what that means for me. Those were some dark days for me when Carter first came home (literally, I hung out under the bed a lot). I don’t particularly want to let myself go back to that place emotionally.
So today I decided I won’t. I will fight the urge to be jealous and instead do what I can to soak up all the positive that comes from change like what’s about to happen around here. Because today, on the day we Americans celebrate mothers, that I’m not giving her the credit she deserves if I do anything other than trust that her love for me remains unchanged.
I feel it in her warmth. In her snuggles. In the precious alone time we get after Carter is sleeping. And today, I saw it in her delicate treatment of Carter as she appreciated him for making her a mom. I feel it when I see them snuggle together on the couch. Doubting her is not fair. Letting change get to me is disrespectful of how hard I see her work each and every day to be the very best mom (and wife and employee) she can be.
Even though she was only a mom to me at first. The time is gone now that I was her one and only and it was us against the world. I’m so proud to see what kind of mother she’s become. She’s my hero, and nothing will ever change that.
Happy Mother’s Day, mom!