It started at 1:23 a.m. That is when baby Carter started crying (all right, more like screaming), almost an hour an a half before he usually wakes up hungry this morning. So mom and dad got up, fed him, and went back to bed. Mom wasn’t sleeping very well to begin with, so I snuggled my best. I’m not sure it mattered.
Then at 5:36 a.m. the phone calls and text messages started. My dear grandma, who was all set to babysit baby Carter on mom’s first day back to work, couldn’t come. She broke a tooth eating breakfast of all things, and needed to get in to see a dentist as soon as possible. Thank goodness for my aunt Morgan, who swooped in to save the day.
Though I’m not entirely sure she saved much other than Carter and I, since it was definitely one of those days for mom. The kind that never ends even though you wish you could just go to bed and have it be tomorrow. The polar opposite of the kind of days you savor. The kind that when it rains it pours. Because when she got back to work, she was greeted by far more than she expected. Far more than she would be capable of catching up on in a day (let alone a month or two). For some, this would be an easy enough mountain to climb. Slow and steady. For mom, who cares so very deeply for doing the right thing even if it hurts, it was like a punch to the stomach.
I know as well as anyone she hates to let people down, and that is exactly what she felt like from the moment she got to back to work. She was letting Carter (and me) down because she left. She was letting her clients down because she couldn’t take care of them all at once. Ultimately, she let herself down because of letting all of this get to her.
Meanwhile, I was home monitoring the Carter situation and he was not happy. It started again yesterday – after days (or maybe weeks?) of fairly decent behavior, he started crying inexplicably. All the time. Morgan rocked him and sang to him and fed him and changed him and dressed him and nothing seemed to work. If I didn’t know better, I would say he and mom are on some sort of level emotional playing field. The way she has been crying the last couple of days mirrors his cries in a way I can’t think is a coincidence.
But it ended at 9:08 p.m. Baby Carter finally fell asleep. And mom and dad breathed a collective sigh of relief. Because let’s be honest. Sometimes there are days like this. Days with very little (if any) silver lining. Days that just plain run us down. When it rains it pours. But at least I know one thing for sure. That rainbow always follows the storm.
Just one step at a time…
Baby steps. Ha, pun intended. 😉
[…] When It Rains | Wiley’s Wisdom […]
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that is it , always think of the rainbow when it rains. To be honest, Carter does not know what is happneing and suddenly he does not have mum all day round, so it is new for him. He will settle I am sure into the new routine, so will your mum, as hard as it will be. As mums we do feel guilty about letting our children down , not be with them often enough, and yet life/work does not allow it otherwise. Probably mum needs to try hard to let go of the guilt feelings as Carter does not see it that way. But looking forward and make a feast of seeing him and you after work and dedicate real love and quality time with you two. It makes up for not seeing you two all day! Stay strong mum and trust Wiles and Carter to be ok without you. Hugs to all of you!
You have a way of making my mom feel better with your words. Just wanted you to know that. Thank you!!!
High paw and lots of hugs,
[…] When It Rains | Wiley’s Wisdom […]
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We all know days like this, W. Your cuddles and your vigilance were the brightest bright spot in that day. Consistency and peace from the ground up.
Love and licks,
Well said as always dear Cupcake. What would I do without you?
I feel mums pain, I returned from work after a week off to find my colleague that was covering from me has basically produced a new folder in my email inbox entitled ‘to deal with’ and she has shoved the 1100 emails I received (including the junk ones) into this folder. Hope mum and Carter are feeling a little happier now – hugs to you all!!
Hello friend! It’s been a while – I’ve missed you! Oh my goodness gracious – 1100 emails? I can’t imagine such a thing! Hang in there!!!
Lots of love,
I will sweety. I am visiting your blog daily, but I’m not finding the time to comment. Now I am thinking about you all – hope mum’s knee is much better!!
I’m glad to hear you are still visiting me regularly as I think of you often and hope all is well. No need to comment if you don’t have time – though I do love hearing from you!
Everything is mixed, but I am loving my new little house. However on completing I realised it needed gutting before I can move in so I currently spend my evenings and weekends DIYing, currently I can be found unscrewing or stripping!! But it feels so empowering, and the little place feels like home already!!
I’m so glad to hear your new house is working out well even if it needs a little tender loving care! That will all make things feel more homey and you can put your own creative spin on things so that’s a bonus.
Lots of love to you!
I love your positive spin!!
You just keep doing what you are doing Wiley, you may not think the cuddles help but they really do. Sometimes where there are days like these, where everything is changing and there is so much going on it feels like it will never sort itself out; the things that are constant and warm help us all pull through. And that’s what you are. Please give your mum a hug from us, if you can spare it!
Hugs, Carrie (Myfie, Ellie and Millie) x
Thanks for the hugs! We love hugs and snuggles and cuddles because, as you said, they go a long way toward bringing joy into a person’s day.
Hugs and high paws right back at you all!
Good job, Wyles – focusing on the rainbow. And huge kudos to Aunt Morgan for saving the day and listening to Carter cry despite all she did – I’ve had one of those as an Aunt…. For Mom, shoot, some days you just have to cling with your fingernails and hang in there. xxoo HuntMode, Ella the Greythound and Elby, That Cat!
That sounds about right about the clinging with the fingernails…I am guilty of abandoning the scene sometimes in favor of a bed in another bedroom (or sometimes even downstairs).
Lots of love to the family,
[…] to me, the colors of life are open for interpretation by anyone on any given day. A few days ago it rained. But today I found it. My rainbow. Today, as I sat in my own version of grey, I was reminded life […]